I don't like to be yelled at, criticized, lectured or bossed around. And neither does my son. Or my husband, for that matter. I am trying to find other ways to get my son to do what he needs to do for our family to function well.
What do I do besides yelling, criticizing, lecturing, and other embarrassing methods?
Here it is in principle: The Other Golden Rule
Here's how I rule with the grace of a homemaking queen: When I am at my best, I say something like, "I am sorry, it looks like you won't be ready to play the Wii game today. You can play it after you finish your homework with a better attitude."
Or I might say, "I'll be so happy to play with you after you clean up the puzzle."
After proving a number of times that I will back up my words to the extent that our whole little world shuts down, my son knows without a doubt that these gentle-sounding words mean business.
Learning to speak to my son in such a positive way has decreased our power struggles! I don't get mad as often! He doesn't retaliate as often! It's great!!!!
I hope it helps you!!